Guidelines for Cats

[Nico]

www.jamesshuggins.com/h/hum1/guidelines_for_cats.htm

Some of these are pretty amusing

[Loz]

So scarily true too

[shred]

I love this one:

Cat Speak
Humans will sometimes try to speak in cat language, attempting to 'meow' at you while having no real idea what they're saying! Cats can either meow back and try and fool the human into thinking that there is a real connection going on, or they can stare at the human with a puzzled look on their face...after all, the human just told you that your mother was the whore of every tomcat in town! Did they mean that or did they simply not understand the implications of their attempting to meow? It's hard to say, as the level of human advancement in this area is very limited...about the only 'catspeak' they actually understand is "I'm starving" and "Let me out...NOW!" If they have truly insulted you or your family, feel free to either tell them how stupid they are in cat language or walk away indignantly.

I'm always doing that and I know my cat thinks I'm stupid.

[Loz]

I don't meow at Choo. I just talk to him. He is so smart he understands completely

[shred]

Oh my cat understands English (and Tamil too!) but it's me that thinks he would understand me better if I meow at him.

Hence the "Is she kidding me?!" look I get from him.

[Shaun]

Yeah those all sound like Sooty. He likes having conversations, he starts them all the time.

[Deleted]

The Door and Toys guildelines sound exactly like my friend Philip's cats Joey and Sammy. Sammy really more with the door one. I'll open the door for him to go out and then he'll just sit there, debating if he really made the right choice or not. They'll both turn anything left on the floor--or any counter top they can jump to--into a toy.

[Beck]

I don't think Joey understands people talk or people meows He turns everything into a toy too. It isn't always funny