Tempting Fate

[Amber]

Edit: Title changed. Might be permanent.



Prologue

Felicia Moor died on February 26th, 2005. It was a quick, virtually painless death- riding in a turquoise Toyota Tercel, struck head-on by a Ford pick-up truck. She was unconscious on impact, and dead soon after. The driver of the Turcel wasn't hit as hard and had a minor head injury along with quite a few cuts that were fairly deep, and survived. The driver of the truck got away with only a few cuts and bruises. Lucky him. It figures that the person who caused the accident in the first place would walk away practically unharmed. Other than a much damaged Ford, that is. Boohoo.

Dying isn’t what you probably think it is. There’s no tunnel, or bright white light. Actually, it’s pretty dark, even after the initial death- think about it, whether you have your eyes closed or open when you die your soul leaves your body, so everything goes black, to begin with.

[Amber]

Chapter One

When she “woke up”, for lack of a better phrase, she found herself in an almost empty dim-lit room. The only things in the room were a small lamp and the bed that she was laying- now sitting up- on. The wall she faced had a door on its far right, but she couldn’t see a knob. The floor was completely covered in dirt and the walls looked like they were rotting and had never been painted. It was as if someone had built this house for no one to live in, to just sit there.

She blinked a few times to adjust to the scene. Where was she? As hard as she tried, she couldn’t remember coming to this building at all. In fact, the last thing she remembered was her and her mother leaving the house. They were engaged in witty banter and ready to head out to a local super center to pick up a few things. And then…and then…

For the life of her, she couldn’t recall what happened after that.

Slowly she stood up, abandoning the bed. She looked down at herself- she wasn’t wearing the clothes that she’d been wearing earlier. That was odd. She didn’t remember changing…but considering she didn’t remember much else, it didn’t seem so strange. What did, though, was the fact that the outfit she was wearing now was a loose-fitting gown, the kind of ones that you get when you’re admitted to a hospital that you never like because you feel exposed and uncomfortable. She frowned. Was this a hospital? If it was, they should be shut down…it sure didn’t look sanitary enough a place for saving people’s lives.

Saving people’s lives…that seemed to strike something in her, ring a bell maybe. Still, she couldn’t place anything. All of her thoughts were jumbled, as if she did actually know what was going on, but couldn’t organize her mind well enough to understand it. That or she was suppressing it.

Instead of continuing to try to solve the predicament she was in, she started for the door, slowly. Each step she took she felt a pain. It was distant, but it was there. She winced. Where had that come from? It must have something to do with why she was in the building…but still she chose not to think of it.

Just as she was about to try to find a way to open the door, someone else opened it for her…obviously not exiting the room, but entering it. It was a woman. She wasn’t too much older than Felicia, or if she was, she didn’t look it. Felicia was seventeen, and this woman looked no more than nineteen or twenty. The illusion of the closeness of age comforted her, but she was still wary, because she still didn’t know what was going on. The woman gave her a tentative smile.

“I’m sure you’re wondering what has happened.” She said this carefully, as if not to set off any alarm. Felicia didn’t look frightened or panicked, so she continued, “And what still is happening, of course. You don’t know where you are, correct?”

Felicia shook her head. How did this woman know that she didn’t know where she was? Unless someone had brought her here…but who would do that and just leave her alone? Surely her mother wouldn’t. She hadn’t been with anyone else that day.
The mystery just kept on getting more complicated by the second.

“That’s understandable,” she said, holding up a clipboard the Felicia didn’t notice before, and jotted down a quick note before speaking again, “It happens after an event as traumatic and entirely too fast that you experienced. Your memories will come back to you soon, all at once. Then you’ll understand part of what is going on. I have to warn you though…The initial remembering isn’t very pleasant. The shock might send you into a panic attack.”

Felicia’s eyebrows furrowed, not understanding what she could mean. What traumatic event? If it was that bad there was no way she wouldn’t remember it. She clung to every bad memory she ever had and overanalyzed it, constantly asking herself ‘what if’ questions. She wasn’t the type to ignore stuff that really upset her. A traumatic event…She felt like it should mean something to her, but right that second, it didn’t.

“You’ll know what I mean when it happens,” the other woman said, “I’m Molly, by the way.” She smiled again, trying to be as friendly as possible without acting as if they had always known each other because that would be slightly disturbing.

“Molly.” Felicia said, in a sort of questioning tone. She still was trying to remember what happened that she was apparently supposed to know. Molly began to say something else…and that’s when everything hit her in what felt like a crushing blow to the chest. She swore she felt a gust of wind so strong that she took a step back, and the pain in her chest made her gasp.

The car was going at a normal speed. Not the speed limit, of course- Who ever went the speed limit on the highway nowadays, anyways? It was going slower than most of the other cars, so they weren’t being reckless. The radio’s volume was light and airy. The conversation that was going on was an easy one, so easy that it seemed natural, and it was between Felecia and her mother.

Slowing down further, they made their way towards the exit, blinker on the whole way. They reached the end of it and took a right. At first there were no problems. The driver followed the lessons she’d learned years before, looking both ways before turning. What she couldn’t see was the speeding menace making his way too quickly down the road…by the time she did, it was too late.

When the impact happened, time didn’t slow down like it’s always described as in stories and films. It was fast. Felicia could feel a scream creeping its way up her throat, but it didn’t even have the time to make its way out before her head and torso was cut with shards of glass that’d been broken. The truck who had hit them had been turning left at the exact moment that they collided, striking the passenger side harder than the driver’s. Her mother let out an audible gasp before the glass broke. Her mouth was closed when it did, so none of it got in her mouth. A few shards hit her head and upper body, like it did her daughter’s, but the quantity of small specks was much less.

Felicia looked over to her mother, who was looking at her in horror at the very same moment, and gave her a tiny smile. She breathed an “I love you” but it was so quiet that no human being could make it out. Somehow, though, her mother looked like she was smiling back and nodded her head a little before closing her eyes, falling unconscious. They had an understanding in that moment. They knew what was going to happen…Felicia was sure her mother would be okay, and her declaration of appreciation to her mother was her silent goodbye. Her mother might have known what was about to happen, but that wasn’t going to dull the pain when she woke up to find that her daughter was dead. She probably wouldn’t even remember the small exchange. Felicia frowned. She heard muffled and distant shouting of what must have been coming from the driver of the Ford, but she couldn’t tell what he was saying. Peacefully, she drifted into an endless sleep…

That didn’t explain where she was. Shouldn’t she be in a coffin, six feet under a pile of a mix of dirt, rocks, and grass? Or was it too soon for that? What about a morgue, in a drawer that looked like it held case files but instead held a cold and lifeless body of a teenaged girl? She shuddered at the thought. Then another one occurred to her…

“Is this heaven?”

Molly couldn’t help herself- she laughed at the question, loudly. Felicia raised an eyebrow. What was so funny? It seemed like a good question, considering that she was dead…Or at least, she thought she was. Was she?

“Is it a hospital?”

Her question was once again sincere and Molly still chuckled a little. Her eyes narrowed. It wasn’t even that she was confused anymore, but that she was angry at Molly for laughing at her questions like she was an ignorant child. She didn’t appreciate it at all, and it showed. Molly cleared her throat.

“I’m sorry. Just the thought of this place being heaven…well, look at it,” she glanced around the room, widely gesturing with her hands, “It’s a little…unclean to be heaven, don’t you think?”

“Well…I didn’t think dying would lead to some dirty room with some woman I’ve never seen or heard of before in my life, but here we are. So I thought maybe it could be…after all, don’t judge a book by its cover, right?”

This made her chuckle again, “I suppose that’s true, but this is far from heaven.”
Felicia’s eyes must have widened because the woman gave an empathetic smile and continued to explain.

“Don’t worry, it’s not that far from heaven. It’s far from hell, too. Since you’re new to it we’ll call it…limbo,” she stated, and smirked.

“Why am I in limbo?” Felicia asked. She had never been a really religious person, but was she going to be kept from whatever higher place there was out there? She didn’t think that was fair, at all. Just because someone isn’t very strict about their beliefs shouldn’t mean that she should be rejected from such a place. God was supposed to be all-forgiving and loving to everyone…Wasn’t he?

“Because, Felicia Moor, you just might have a greater purpose than to move on to eternal peace just yet,” Molly said meaningfully.

“Greater purpose?” she asked, not knowing what purpose a person could have once they stopped breathing. Weren’t they supposed to rest?

Molly nodded, and walked over near the bed and set her clipboard on it before facing her again. Felicia barely noticed it herself, but she was walking after her, more than a little captivated by their conversation.

“You see, not everyone goes to heaven or hell when they die, as everyone seems to think. Some help with certain things having to do with the bigger picture. And we believe that you could be one of them. Your soul…it has good in it, more good than the average person. You heart seems more…pure, somehow.”

This made Felicia even more confused than before. She had a pure heart…how was that? She was never one to do anything outstandingly nice for…anyone. Then again, she’d never been cruel once in her life. Though she didn’t let anyone walk all over her, she was never intentionally mean, and she was very kind to her family, friends, and even strangers she met. That made her understand…sort of. Molly continued to explain.

“Unfortunately because of this…the things you have to do aren’t pleasant, but it takes a person like you to do them,” she said, choosing her words carefully, as she had done when she first entered the room.

This made her a tad bit alarmed. “What sort of…things?” she asked, a slight gulp following her words.

Molly’s mouth twitched, revealing a frown. “I’m not sure I’m the best person to explain…”

“Please, just tell me,” Felicia said, “You’ve told me so much already…I don’t think another stranger coming in and telling me what I have to do is going to be a very good idea…”

The older woman sighed. She still didn’t look like she wanted to tell Felicia anything but her mouth opened and words flowed out besides. “You have to help people…deal with death.”

Felicia looked sort of relieved. “That doesn’t seem as bad as you’re making it out to be…Not really. That’s what you’re doing, isn’t it?”

Molly smiled sadly. “Not exactly. You have to follow them around, making sure their life is especially pleasant before they die. No one wants to die when their life is going badly. They don’t get to amend things. Sometimes you even feel what they and the people who care for them feel. That means it will be heartbreaking for you when they do pass. But it’s something that needs to be done.”

She knew she should be disturbed by the idea, but the seventeen year old just wasn’t. Her lips curled in a tiny smile. “I don’t think I’ll mind….too much. I’ll be helping them, you said?”

Molly only nodded, surprised by her reaction.

“I like helping people,” Felicia stated simply and Molly smiled just as she had.
“I’m glad to hear it,” Molly replied, just as simply. Then she gestured towards the door. “Shall we?”

“Shall we what?” Felicia asked, not understanding the meaning of Molly’s question. The next reply that came at her was yet another simple one, though it would be an action that would change her life, hopefully for the better.

“Begin your new life.”

Felicia didn’t bother to answer as she left the room quietly, with Molly following her with a gleam of hope in her eyes.

[Amber]

Chapter Two

Just a little over three years had passed since that day. At first the job had been hard but now it was just a part of her that she couldn’t- and didn’t want to- get rid of. She enjoyed it. Not the people having to give up life, but helping them move on. It made her glad when they made the realization that it was all for the best and that everything would be okay. After they came to know that, they passed onto heaven.

She only dealt with the good ones. There were other people assigned to the ones being sent to hell for unimaginably evil deeds. There were other people with a job just like hers, and she had become friends with some of them.

That part of her job made her resent it, however in a small way. She had died a few years ago and hadn’t moved onto paradise yet. It wasn’t that she had unfinished business. Well, she did, but only because she wanted it. When she knew it was time for her to ascend, she would be free to. That time just hadn’t come yet.

The other part of it that she didn’t really like was getting close to people- especially the ones left behind when the person she was helping cope died. Their combined pain made her want to curl up and clutch her chest. It was almost unbearable, but she stayed under control. She had to, for the deceased’s sake. If she couldn’t keep her composure, after all, how was she supposed to keep theirs?

Molly hadn’t been lying when she said that Felicia would be starting a new life. She was now living in Colorado, too many miles away from her previous home in New York. It was nice, though. She lived in a small cabin that wasn’t too civilization deprived, and she liked it there. It was relaxing and coming home to her small and comfortable surroundings made her feel more at ease.

After a long day- or to be more realistic, week- of convincing people to make their lives better and, once they died, telling them that there was a better place waiting for them…She came home and acted like she was normal. She had television programs that she watched. She read books. Her favorite bands often played in the background when the television wasn’t on. She drew. Sometimes she drew the people she’d helped, or the people she ‘worked with’. Sometimes she just drew for the fun of it- something outside in nature, or something abstract.

But to be completely normal was far from possible. She couldn’t get involved in a relationship. Not with the normal men she envied or even the men who were in her line of work. If she got attached to the normal men, who were completely alive, they would eventually find out what her odd choice- though it wasn’t really a choice- of profession was. The men that were like her were never in one place at any given time. Actually, she was one of the select few that had a permanent home at the moment- others traveled where people needed them, and sometimes even where people didn’t at times they weren’t needed.

Yes, there were times when counseling wasn’t needed. Whoever was dealing the cards in this life or death game always knew if the people needed help either before they died or after, to know what was going on. Of course, everyone needed guidance to know where they were supposed to go, but sometimes they just knew. The people ‘up there’ made sure of that. To the recently deceased, it just felt like it was instinct.

There were also times when death was slow. Yes, people die every day, but not the same amount of people, and there were a lot of advisers roaming around- they made up a good part of the population. Just like the living, the advisers need vacation time every so often too.

Molly had told her all of this before she let her get settled in her cabin in Colorado. She let her know of the pros and cons of the profession. They were non-negotiable, unless there were special circumstances.

She hadn’t seen Molly since she had gotten settled in. Molly worked in an entirely different department, initiating new employees, as they are called. Felicia didn’t like to think of it as a job, though, but rather a vocation- She really loved it and believed that it was what she was always meant to do. How she believed that was a mystery, because it was certainly not a normal type of job. It was just…right- fitting.

In truth, she hadn’t ever thought about what she wanted to be when she grew up when she was still alive. Then the accident happened, and it felt like it didn’t matter anymore. But this did matter. She knew that she was meant to help people.

And she’d helped so many people. She took time to remember little things about them when she had time to herself. She liked to honor their memory. Sometimes, before they died, she took pictures with them. She would take the pictures and sketch them. Right now, she was working on a collage of all of them. The people she had met…some of them had been so very incredible. She admired them, even in death.

There was never once when she had time to think that she didn’t think about the people that used to be part of her life, too. She missed her friends- she had a best friend, whose name was Amy, and very few other close friends, but she loved them all the same. She missed them, but she missed her mother more than anyone else. She still wondered if her mother remembered that knowing exchange that occurred just before Felicia had died.

At times she wanted to know so badly that she wanted to communicate with her mother, but that was forbidden. Not only would it send the poor woman into shock but it would send a buzz across the globe. A girl that died in a crash, whose body had been pulled from the crash and easy to identify, alive? What is going on? Is this some sort of government secret? Is this what happens to everyone after they die?

That, or her mother would slowly go insane and be committed to insane asylum, which Felicia just couldn’t bear. She wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she made her mother go crazy with the thought that her daughter was alive when she had seen her dying before her very eyes- when she had more than likely been the one to identify the body with a face with an expression trying to remain emotionless in front of the morgue workers. Imagining her mother locked in a room with white padded walls made her lose a small part of her own sanity. If she was responsible for her mother being caged up like an animal, she wouldn’t even be able to live with herself. The very thought of it disgusted her.

Her mother never liked showing weakness or vulnerability to other people. It always got her in trouble, especially with men. With her father, who had abused her for so long before she finally decided that she’d had enough and stood up to him. With men in bars she met when she went through a year of desperation. Even with Felicia around, she felt lonely- like a piece of her was missing. She tried to find that missing piece in strangers, but there was never anyone that she sought it out in that she spotted even a speck of what she was looking for.

So she hardened herself to every outsider, sometimes even family…but never to Felicia. Felicia was her baby, her everything. They spent as much time as they could together. They had a special bond that most mothers and teenaged daughters don’t experience until they are much older, perhaps never.

It was only understandable that when her daughter died in the accident, there was a new tear in the missing place inside of her that made it much larger than before. Suddenly, the piece didn’t fit very well anymore, and for a while, she couldn’t put herself together.

She was a mess. Even though it was clear to everyone else, including the driver of the truck, who didn’t deny he had been being reckless, that it wasn’t her fault, she couldn’t help but blame herself. Like Felicia, Doria was always the analyst of everything that happened around her, asking ‘what if’. What if she hadn’t decided to take her daughter shopping with her that day? What if she had taken the longer, and what she now knew as safer, way, instead of the highway?

Of course she should have known that there was nothing she could have done differently to keep it from happening. She couldn’t predict the future. But that didn’t stop that constant flow of thoughts and idea going through her mind on a daily basis, wishing she could go back in time knowing what could happen, and change something so it wouldn’t.

It was that way for almost two years- more along the lines of about a year and a half- before she started to show any progress. She became friends with neighbors who she confided in. She shared private jokes and secrets with them. Though they didn’t replace her daughter, they helped to fill the void.

When the two year mark hit, her mother decided it best to put away her things. Not give them away, because that would be too cruel. She packed them all in little brown cardboard boxes and sorted them in the attic. The thought of putting them in the basement had occurred to her, but she preferred her daughter’s belongings to be in a higher place, as she knew her daughter must be right now. She just knew that a sweet and caring child such as her own would be accepted into heaven’s gates. She didn’t know there was such a thing as the job Felicia had, but if she did, she may consider that a possibility of where she was as well; And this, also, could be considered a higher place. What’s better than helping strangers fulfill their life before it’s ended?

Three years had passed and her mother still fiddled with her possessions- her clothes, old notebooks, and even older dolls with tattered clothes and knotted hair. Pictures were still left all around the house- those, she would never put away. Her daughter was too much to precious to her to be left in a box, to become dusty and forgotten.

Felicia only knew all of this because although she wasn’t allowed to communicate with her mother, she was still allowed to watch over her. An ability that came along with her new life was to check in with people she knew without having to visit them. It was really only supposed to be used for people that would be dying shortly, but Felicia had always been a rebel.

She had watched her mother tediously over the first year, once she had figured out how to without getting caught. Now she only did it on special occasions- Christmas, New Year’s, her mother’s birthday. It was hard for her to watch and not be able to celebrate these events with her as well. But she knew she had to stay back. She hadn’t let go yet, but in time, she was slowly learning how to.

Part of the reason for her letting go had a lot to do with her occupation. Seeing that what she basically did was teach people to let go, she couldn’t stop herself from following her own advice. It was logical, really. Why hold so tightly onto a life that she could never return to?

Her advisee, as she liked to call them, this week was a fifty six year old man who is going to die for one health reason or another. That was another thing- she was never told exactly how they were going to die, she only got a vague idea. For example, if a man was going to die from falling off a roof while trying to repair it, she would only be allowed know that it would be an accidental death. This prevented her, and other people like her, from trying to save someone whose time it was to go. Doing so would set off the natural order of the universe, and the punishment for causing a shift in the balance was severe.

This was a rule that Felicia had not broken. No matter how much she wanted to save someone, she had to remind herself that somewhere out there was a place where they would find peace and happiness. Just because their life on Earth ended didn’t necessarily mean that their life in general ended. Still, it was hard to let some people pass, for different reasons.

For instance, about a year ago, Felicia had been assigned to Taylor Russo. Taylor’s death was ruled accidental by whoever knew about the deaths before they happened and sent the categories to the ‘advisers’- and it had been. She was hit by a speeding car when she tried to get her cat out of the road. The cat survived. Taylor was six.

It took every inch of willpower Felicia had not to grab her and stop her from going out in the road. She had to be near Taylor when she died so she could guide her spirit in the right direction, and that either meant watch or turn your back as another human being died. As painful as it was, Felicia usually watched.

She wanted so badly to save the little girl. She had tears in her eyes before the six year old even stepped near the road, because she knew what was going to happen and she couldn’t do anything. Reminding her self that if Taylor didn’t go now something bad would happen, she restrained herself, fists clenched. It wouldn’t matter if she saved her, not to Taylor’s fate- when it was time for someone to go; something usually got them one way or another, in the end.

When it was over, she walked over to the side of the road, where Taylor’s spirit stood- stood being the wrong choice of a word, because it was more like she was floating. Felicia, having the power to touch the incorporeal, stroked her hair and then took her hand. The child looked up to her.

“Are you an angel?”

Felicia stared down at her, not surprised. She’d been asked the question before. Usually, she answered no. This time was different. “Yes sweetie. I am.”

And that was it. Taylor just smiled and nodded after that, not saying anything else. She took it better than some of the 90 year olds Felicia had dealt with in the past. Felicia led her where she led everyone else- the gate to the gates of what she can only assume is heaven. It’s a giant arch, and when Felicia presses her palm to it, it lights. An invisible veil appears with a rush of energy, and there is a ripple in the air. Sometimes the people are scared, sometimes they’re not. Whether they are or aren’t doesn’t affect the decision they finally make, and that is to walk under the huge metal arch. It could be for a variety of reasons, but mainly it’s their faith that pushes them.

Felicia assumed that it is heaven only because she didn’t really know. She hadn’t had that privilege yet, though she knew one day she would be able to follow her advisees to the place that she speaks so very highly of. Until that day, she would keep wondering.

[Amber]

Chapter Three

The fifty six year old man’s name was Stephen. He had been married to his wife for thirty four years. When he was thirty seven, many years after their wedding day and an unusual age to start fatherhood, his son Kyle was born. He was a successful carpenter, a good friend, loving husband and father, and he was going to die in two days.

The time given for Felicia to counsel always depended on how much needed fixing. Two days said that all she needed to do was befriend him and his family and help them with dealing with his death once he passed. There wouldn’t be much to fix, if anything at all. She just needed to ease the pain. She’d gotten better at that in the past few years.

The meeting place was always prearranged, and this time it was in the local super center- which Felicia considered ironic, because that’s where she was headed when she had died- at precisely 2:24 p.m. in aisle three.

She walked into the store nonchalantly. She never acted suspicious. There was no reason to. She was normal…except for the fact that she was dead and knew when other people were going to die, and helped them with their deaths.

Okay. So she wasn’t normal.

But there was no reason to act like a paranoid freak- there was no possible way that people knew that she wasn’t really in there to buy a loaf of bread and a gallon of milk. Still, she pretended to browse. She skimmed Hallmark cards with her fingers on the way in. Silly, childish phrases and rhymes made the company millions. She could think of better things to say to someone than those fabricated in a card.

Yet, seeing them made her nostalgic. Her hand reached the ‘Miss You’ cards, and she pulled it away. At that moment, she wanted to buy a card and send it to her mother, signed. It wouldn’t be all that hard- but then she remembered the therapy her mother would need after that. Also, it would be breaking the rules. Breaking the rules wasn’t any small act, either- there were consequences- major consequences. She didn’t know what, only that anyone she had ever met whose fate mingled with this world had told her so, and they had not had a joking tone in their voice. She wasn’t about to test their seriousness.

Pushing these thoughts to the back of her mind, she made her way to the third aisle down. When she reached it, she glanced down and sighed. It was stocked with shelves full of soda. No wonder the guy had health problems.

She sighed and walked into the aisle. Normally she wouldn’t have stepped foot in it- she was a fan of water herself, and thought that soda wasn’t worth wasting even two dollars per two liter bottle.

Her wrist came up and her eyes went to the face of her watch. Two more minutes of pretending she was deciding between two similar flavors of carbonation that offered no nutrients whatsoever.

Two minutes wasn’t a long time, so it passed quickly. Before she knew it, a man with not as much grey hair as she expected was walking in her direction. She looked at him, frowning. He looked kind- it was too bad that his life wouldn’t last very much longer. He was also thin and seemed healthy- the lack of grey hair being only one of the signs of this. She doubted that the soda had anything to do with his death.

She stayed where she was, still pretending she was going to buy a bottle of soda at some point. All she could do now is wait- it wasn’t her job to approach them. They always found her, though she didn’t know how.

He hadn’t come up to her yet. It was 2:24, almost 2:25. Twenty more seconds and the minute would change. She began to be anxious- there had never been a meeting that someone had missed before. What was going on?

As he passed behind her, he was in close proximity. Fifteen seconds. What was the holdup? It was never cut this close…but then what needed to happen, happened…he collapsed, falling against her. It was a good thing she had been turning around at the exact moment, to see what he was doing. He would have probably knocked her down due to all of his muscle. Instead she held him up, and with no small amount of effort.

Her gasp was audible. There was no one else in the aisle or at the end of it except for them. She was trying to think why this would be happening- now, that is. He definitely wasn’t supposed to die today. She knew all information about who she helped, and his death date was most definitely two days from now. Nothing like this had ever happened before. Usually when she met them, they would accidentally bump into each other, or she would help them pick something up…But never this.

The seconds she was speechless for quickly went away, and she yelled “Someone! Anyone?!” as loud as she could- which considering that the surprise had taken the breath out of her, was pretty loud. A woman who looked like she was in her twenties came into the aisle and widened her eyes.

Before she could ask what happened, Felicia yelled, maybe a little too harshly, “Call 911! Now!” and the woman sprinted off to the nearest cashier and explained in a rush what was going on. Felicia watched, helpless, mentally cursing herself for not bringing a cell phone with her. The cashier reached for a phone that was at the desk he was working at and frantically dialed the three numbers.

Felicia looked down at Stephen. She calmed herself down, hushing her own heavy breathing, and listened for his. It seemed like forever but finally she heard it, and saw his chest rise and fall. That was good- he wasn’t dead, not yet. He wasn’t supposed to be. She kept watching him, hoping that she would have time to fix his problems, however how small, before he passed. Right now the chances of that weren’t looking so good- his breath was getting shallower.

It seemed like it had taken forever, but the ambulances finally arrived. She couldn’t see them, but the wailing of their sirens rang high in her ears. Her hearing must have been increased by the adrenaline that must have been coursing through her body because of the shock, because she swore she heard the automatic doors slide open, and the paramedics hurried footsteps. They ran into the aisle with their boxes in hand and stretcher being pushed behind them.

She moved out of the way, not letting him hit the floor, but handing him over to the medical professionals. They said something, but she wasn’t really listening. She nodded to pretend.

What was she was doing was remembering. Her mind f######ed back to a day when she’d been unpacking all of her “belongings”- which included clothes and other necessities she’d bought earlier that week- and Molly had been helping her. At first they were having light conversation, but the talk took a turn when Felicia started getting curious about what she had to do.

“So…before, when you said I had to make people’s lives happier before they died…what exactly does that entail?” Felicia asked, wondering what she could possibly do to make a complete stranger’s life better in their last days on Earth.

Molly looked up from a bag that she was pulling things out of and blinked at her. The question had come from out of the blue. Seconds ago, they’d been talking about how Felicia always used to sleep with a stuffed animal- a purple bear, to be specific. She’d named him Berry and claimed that the tackiness had come from the fact that she’d gotten the bear when she was four.

“Oh…well, you make sure any conflicts that may be going on are resolved…fights with lovers, parents, anyone… If they’re having a tough time otherwise, help them in the best way you can. Most of the time, that involves befriending them.”

“I have get close to people who I know are going to die?” Felicia asked, her voice fainter than before, “That’s not fair.”

Molly looked at her with sympathetic eyes, the ends of her mouth curling down in a frown. “I didn’t say it was fair…It’s quite the opposite. The only person it’s really in favor of is the deceased. You have to get to know them and then lose them all too soon afterwards. It requires a certain amount of selflessness.”

Felicia wasn’t all that sure of just how selfless she could be. This being before she figured out what would it would do to her mother, she had bought a stationary set to write to her. She hadn’t, partly because of her own willpower and partly because of Molly’s extreme discouragement. Not to mention scowling, sometimes even threatening.

While Molly looked innocent enough, when she was angry or serious, she looked deadly. Felicia didn’t know her very well, so she had to guess that the other girl meant business- not that it was too hard. Still, she had her questions, and as long as Molly was willing to answer them, Felicia was completely willing to ask. She tried not to be too blunt about it.

“What if…if the person who’s supposed to die doesn’t die when they’re supposed to?” It was a harmless enough question on Felicia’s part, but the way Molly took it made her expression darken.

“You must not save them. It will only mean trouble for you and everyone else. Including them. Do you understand me?” Her tone had turned into a low, husky one. She sounded more than serious at that moment.

Her tone surprised Felicia so much that she literally winced. Maybe it hadn’t been the smartest question to ask, but she hadn’t even been thinking about saving anyone. She didn’t feel like interfering with fate more than the next person, so she decided to amend herself. “That’s…not what I meant. I mean, what if something else stops them from dying?” Like an unknown in an algebraic expression, she thought to herself.

Molly looked at her, her eyes still narrow and expression grim. “You don’t need to worry about that right now. I doubt it will ever happen, besides.” She looked back down at the bag she’d been working on minutes ago, and resumed unpacking it.

“What happens?”

“Nothing you need to fret about. Just trust me.” Molly said, and then went silent for the rest of the time that she helped Felicia.

When she brought herself back to the present, she couldn’t help but wonder why Molly had avoided the question entirely. She wondered what did happen, if some outside force changed what was destined to happen. It had to be bad- if it wasn’t, she would have been assured of that.

Instead, she didn’t know…and she wasn’t sure that she ever wanted to. The way she looked at it, as long as it wasn’t going to happen to the people she dealt with; she wasn’t going to think about it. The possibilities could be horrendous.

She looked down at the middle-aged man. Today wasn’t his day to die…but what if he did? What if his predetermined fate had somehow shifted? She wasn’t sure if they had “met” a minute too late. How much of a difference could one minute make?

Shaking her head, she didn’t think about it, because she knew the answer. A minute could change everything. A minute could make or break you. A minute could get you hit head-on by a pick-up truck and killed.

The paramedics lifted the man onto the stretcher. There was an oxygen mask on his face- she hadn’t even noticed that they’d put it on- and they were starting to tow him away. She watched the stretcher disappear as it moved toward the door. They were hurrying- she could tell that he was in big trouble; the kind of trouble that some people didn’t get out of.

Too focused on the stretcher being pulled away, she didn’t notice the paramedic who was still standing close to her at first. He asked her a question that she didn’t hear. She looked at him and tilted her head in a way that was asking him to repeat his question.

“Are you related to him?” he asked, simply. She furrowed her eyebrows. If she was just a regular bystander, she would have told him no- but she was no regular bystander. She had just a big a part in this as his real family did.

She nodded.

“Okay then, you can come with us and sit next to him while we drive to the hospital…You just won’t be able to sit too close because we have to work on him on the way there. Is that okay? Or do you want to drive your own car?” What he was asking was procedure but it was wasting time. She could’ve gone with them in the ambulance, but getting herself situated in the vehicle would take time that nor could neither she nor they afford to waste.

“I’ll just take my own car.”

He nodded and turned, rushing out the door. She had to give him credit- he really was trying to do his job, not hanging around for no reason. She walked quickly toward the exit too. She was quick enough to see him jump in the back of the ambulance and close the doors. The lights and sirens came back on, and the screeching faded as the ambulance disappeared down the road.

She opened the car door, slid in, and slammed it shut again. She took a deep breath before she even put the keys in the ignition. It was supposed to be a calming breath but it made her even more nervous. She was still breathing in and out slowly, trying not to over think, as she pulled out of the store’s parking lot and headed toward the nearest hospital, where they would take him.

The ambulance hadn’t gotten there too long before her. She went over the speed limit on the highway, even more than usual. She didn’t want to keep them waiting long because she figured since she was “family” they would want to wait for her before they worked on him too much.

In her hurry, she slammed the door when she got out of the car. She didn’t even slow at the automatic doors of the emergency room and almost ran into them. The paramedic she’d been talking to in the soda aisle was standing there waiting for her.

“So we meet again,” she said, even though she realized that it sounded like a silly thing to say, like he was her archenemy and they were getting ready for a dual to the death.

He didn’t seem to notice the strangeness in the statement, “Hello. We managed to help him breathe on the ride here, but we’re still trying to stabilize him. We haven’t found the source of the problem- it could be range anywhere between stress or heart problems. The actual doctors are going to tell you this, but I like to keep people informed too.” He smiled, but she didn’t return it. He was being too technical about the situation- not that she blamed him. It was what everyone here was trained to do.

He continued, “We’ll just need you to sign some consent papers, if you don’t mind.”

She did mind- that would be a problem. Pretending to be someone else while talking was one thing- leaving a paper trail was another. She chose her words carefully, “I think his wife should be the one to do that…should I call her?”

“Of course, you can use the phone in secretary’s office.” He pointed to the open door behind him, where she could hear people chatting and typing away in. She nodded and stared at him. Hesitantly he walked through the swinging doors where patients were being taken care of, and she went to the nearest phone booth.

When she was told information about the people she needed to help, she was told their last names, too. It was last name here. It wasn’t too hard to find, either- especially since she didn’t have to guess at first names because she figured that Stephen was the man of the house- and she was right. Luckily, they weren’t one of those weird families that didn’t like their number being a part of the phonebook.

She dialed the number as fast as she could; still worried they’d hold back on whatever it was they needed to do if she didn’t contact his wife fast. They shouldn’t- it was their job to save lives- but you never knew.

The phone rang twice, three times. She was worried that no one was going to pick up, but no sooner did her worries begin than an older, kind voice greeted her. “Hello.” It took Felicia a few seconds to compose herself before she could think of the right way to explain what was going on.

“Hello?” the woman repeated, probably thinking that whoever called had hung up.

“Yes, hi…is this Stephen’s wife?” Felicia asked.

“Yes.”

Felicia took a long breath, and everything came out in a rush. “Um, you don’t really know me, but I have really important news. You see, I was in the grocery story today and your husband…well, I assume he’s your husband…he uh, collapsed. I pretended to be his family so I could come with him to the hospital and make sure he got help, but they want me to sign consent forms…and I can’t. Plus, I didn’t think it’d be right for you not to know.”

She wasn’t sure how much of that was really supposed to come out. She hadn’t meant to show more concern for a stranger than was appropriate, but she couldn’t help it. Just talking on the phone with his wife, who she didn’t even have to assume was really his wife, she was getting her emotions tangled with the other woman’s.

The phone line was silent for more than ten seconds. Felicia could hear the woman breathing; trying to search for a response like Felicia had been trying to search for an explanation.

“I…don’t know what to say,” she started out in a shaky voice, “Thank you, I think…You said he collapsed? Dear lord…Yes thank you for helping…He’s at the hospital close to the supermarket yes?” Her voice was shaky and strained- the worry was easy to detect.

“Yes,” Felicia responded, “I’m sorry; I shouldn’t have pretended I was related to him…it just seemed like the right thing to do-”

But she was cut off by Stephen’s wife. “No, no… it was. It might be too much to ask…” she started, obviously not wanting to ask whatever it was, but Felicia had a feeling that she needed to. After a couple seconds she went on, “Could you stay at the hospital until me and my son get there?”

“Of course,” The answer came with no hesitation on Felicia’s part. She heard a sigh of relief on the other end of the line.

“Whoever you are…thank you so much,” the woman said and added, “We’ll get there as fast as we can. Where will you be?”

“The waiting room in the emergency room,” she replied. Saying that made her wonder why there was a waiting room there- if something was really an emergency, it should be taken care of immediately. Then again, some emergencies were more urgent than others…broken limbs could wait if other people were dying.

She was almost too lost in thought to hear Stephen’s wife say thank you yet again before saying that she’d see her soon. Felicia just responded with a sound of acknowledgement, put the phone back on the receiver, and slid the phonebook into the slot on the phone booth below where the actual phone was.

Now that she had even more time to think to herself, she realized how very askew this situation was becoming. Her job did include getting involved- but only to an extent. Though this had only just barely begun, she had a feeling that she was going to get pulled deeper into it than necessary. She silently promised herself she would try her hardest not to- but her gut was telling her that was going to be a lot harder than she thought.

Not wanting to sit, she stood by the doors- not close enough to make them open, but not too far away to see the people who came and went. In a short amount of time, she saw patients that ranged from under ten years old to over seventy five. Most of the “emergencies” were causes of clumsiness- a bleeding arm, a shoulder out of place, a broken wrist...The only serious injury she saw in the five or ten minutes she was standing there was a small boy who must have been eight or nine, being pulled in on a stretcher. Red marks covered what she could see of his body- bee stings. Something that could be deadly even if he wasn’t allergic, and if he was…

She shook her head and averted her eyes, watching for an older woman and a young man to walk through the doors. It didn’t take long, either.

The woman walked in first. She was dressed simply- a plain t-shirt and blue jeans on. Only a few strands of grey hair could be seen, but Felicia believed that she was older than she looked at that moment. She had a kind face, just like her voice.

The man that walked in behind her could have passed for being in his mid-twenties but Felicia knew better because of the basic information she’d been given about Stephen. He was nineteen, and she couldn’t deny how utterly handsome he was. His hair was a dark shade of brown and his eyes were green with what looked like specks of grey in them. Not that she was looking that hard or anything.

She tore her gaze away from him. He hadn’t notice- he actually looked distracted, anxious. Instead she turned to the woman, who was looking around the waiting room chairs for her.

“Over here…” Felicia said, loud enough for her to hear, but still quiet enough to be gentle. The woman smiled at her warily before walking over, and her son followed.

“Hello…I’m Maria Stone. Stephen’s wife…But of course you knew that already,” Maria said, sounding shaky. She had every reason to be, after all. “This is my son, Kyle.” She nodded in his direction as she said this, and he gave a tiny half-wave.

“I would say nice to meet you, if the circumstances were different…” Felicia said. She’d said that line many times in the three years since she’d died- but it was usually after whoever was supposed to die actually died, never before. Yes, this was going to be different after all.

Maria nodded. “You said there were papers I had to sign…?”

“Oh, yeah,” Felicia said, almost forgetting, overwhelmed by the woman’s emotions- she could already feel the worry as if she was inside her head. She didn’t usually feel their emotions this strongly until the day of the death. This was bad. Her expression made Maria blink, but she didn’t bother trying to cover it up, and instead just told her, pointing to the secretary’s office, “They’re in there. Just tell them who you are and they should get them for you.”

Maria didn’t say anything in response- she just headed over toward the office, leaving Kyle and Felicia to stand across from each other awkwardly. Felicia mostly watched as Maria went and signed the papers, making sure everything went alright, but every so often she would sneak glances at the man standing across from her- who didn’t look as if he was looking away from her, which made her try to avert her eyes even more than before, and she could feel herself starting to blush.

Before things got too embarrassing, though, his mother rejoined them. She still had a worried expression on her face. “I signed the papers, and they said that he should be fine…Something’s wrong with his heart, though.” She frowned, but didn’t show more than that. She reminded Felicia of her own mother.

Kyle looked distracted again, and Felicia could guess why- he didn’t want to think about it. He must be close to his father. Felicia felt a surge of extra sympathy for him, though Maria was the one who she should have been feeling more for- she was the one that was showing more emotion, after all. But something about Kyle’s expression…

“Thank you, again,” Maria said, “You’re a complete stranger and…well…you might have just saved my husband’s life.”

“I hope so,” Felicia said, and it wasn’t a lie. She really did hope she had saved him. It wasn’t time to go for him, not yet. But she was sure that Maria wouldn’t be thanking her if she knew what was going to happen just two days later.

“I understand if you want to leave,” Maria told her, not really encouraging her to leave, but letting her know not to feel obligated to stay.

Felicia shook her head. “No, I want to stay.” She had to justify that, because as Maria had said- she was a complete stranger, “I just want to make sure he’s okay. Plus, I’m sure you could use some company.”

Maria smiled at her gratefully, and Kyle didn’t even look in her direction. His mother led them all over to the seats. They all sat down and a silence that should have been awkward- but wasn’t- fell over them…and they waited.

[Amber]

Chapter Four

Time didn’t move fast enough. They sat in the waiting room for an hour, and it slowly turned into over three hours. Even though it seemed to have passed quickly, it still felt as if the minutes had dragged on and on- it felt more like they’d been waiting in the hospital for half of the day.

Other than someone in the group occasionally offering to get the others food or drinks, there was no conversation. There was nothing to talk about. Felicia thought about bringing up a casual topic, but eliminated that idea just as quickly has it had come to her. Maria’s husband’s life was in jeopardy- she wouldn’t want to talk about topics of little importance.

So they sat, not saying a word to each other. Felicia would sometimes glance up at Kyle or Maria- mostly Kyle- to see what they were doing. For the majority of the time Kyle had his arms crossed across his chest, and was tapping his foot and looking to his right, a clear sign that he was uncomfortable. Maria sat with perfect posture, but kept her head tilted down, staring at the floor.

Felicia felt truly uncomfortable too. If she didn’t absolutely have to make sure that Stephen would be alright, at least for today, she would have left an hour or so ago. That wasn’t the case though, so she stayed, determined to find out what was going on. She was the one who usually offered to get them something to eat or drink, because she wasn’t a fan of awkward silence in the slightest.

When a doctor came out of the swinging emergency room doors and started to walk right towards them she breathed a sigh of relief. Even though she hadn’t heard the news yet and didn’t know if it was going to be good, she relaxed at the thought that she wouldn’t have to sit with complete strangers in either case for much longer.

If he had died she would have to offer condolences, and do whatever she could to help Maria and Kyle grieve, but that would be all. End of story. Unless Stephen dying earlier than he was supposed to messed with the cosmic balance somehow, that is…

She willed the thoughts away. She wouldn’t let herself think too much about it. Not yet. His fate was still up in the air as far as she knew.

Maria stood and walked to the doctor, closing the space that remained between them. Kyle stood up but stood about a foot behind his mother. Felicia didn’t bother standing, because her chair was almost right next to where the doctor had been stopped short. She turned to look up at him instead.

He wasn’t smiling, but he wasn’t frowning either. His face was a mask, a face with no emotions. Felicia thought to herself that she shouldn’t be surprised- in this line of work, if you showed too much emotion- mainly in the cases when you had to tell patients bad news- you could cause the patients to overreact. She assumed that the news was bad, which made her stomach clench.

But when the doctor spoke, the tension was immediately relieved, “Mrs. Stone? Stephen is going to be alright. We found that his heartbeat was irregular, causing him to have severe chest pains. He collapsed and…well, you know the rest.”

Maria nodded, but Felicia looked perplexed. Sure, it made sense he had heart problems, because that would have to be the reason for his death in two days. The only thing that confused her was that Stephen had been so collected when he was walking in the beverage aisle- it was impossible to tell that he was having chest pains, which either meant that he must have an incredible tolerance for pain or it hit him so fast that he didn’t have time to even wince before he collapsed.

“So he’ll be alright?” Maria asked, pulling Felicia out of her mini-flashback. The question made Felicia frown- sure he would…for a couple more days.

“We’ll just need to run some tests, of course, to make sure that he’s okay enough to go home,” the doctor continued. Felicia had to bite her tongue from saying something, anything that would make the doctor keep Stephen there for a few more days. Every time she had to counsel someone, there was always at least one opportunity to save them- an opportunity that she forever must turn down.

Maria nodded again, looking just as helplessly oblivious as she had the first time. Even Kyle looked relieved, a little less distracted now. He was actually paying attention to the doctor. Felicia felt what they were feeling- as it was part of what could be called ‘powers’, in order to help them grieve soon. She felt their relief, their worry vanishing, even the joy inside of them. It made her heart ache to think that all of those emotions would soon be replaced with despair.

“He’ll be able to come home today?” asked Maria, the answer that she wanted to hear was even obvious in her tone.

“Most likely he will be. We’ll have to prescribe some medicine which you’ll need to pick up tomorrow if he does go home later today…Speaking of that, would you like to come with me and get that arranged right now, since that’s probably what you’ll have to be doing?” the doctor asked, tilting his head a little. Maria answered “yes” in a small voice and he led her to the secretary’s office where she’d filled out the consent papers hours before.

Kyle and Felicia stood there awkwardly once again, but neither of them made a move to sit down- and he was looking at her again, like before. His gaze seemed to go past the surface and look inside her. It made her feel uncomfortable…and nervous.

“Why do you keep doing that?” she asked, wanting to confront him about it. She didn’t like how he was making her pulse race- she chalked it up to feeling sorry for him, because his father was dying. Yes. That had to be it. After all, what else could it be? Nothing- and those were the thoughts that she kept putting in her head.

“Doing what?” he questioned back innocently. As if he didn’t know what he was doing- but his facial expression gave him away. A smirk was hiding under his composed straight face.

“You know what,” she muttered back.

And he did- he’d always been able to read people pretty well. Throughout his whole life he could almost always tell what someone was feeling or if they were hiding something…Anything about their actions or personality told him what made them nervous, happy, or excited…He’d found his gift as an early age and used it every chance he got.

“There’s something about you. It’s…different,” his eyebrows furrowed, because he wasn’t exactly sure how to word what he wanted to say, “You’re set apart from everyone else.”

Her breath caught as she listened to him. Did he know? No, that wasn’t possible. No humans knew about her kind. If they did, all hell would break loose- maybe quite literally. “What do you mean?”

“Just…something about you, it’s unique,” he said and smiled. “I like it.”
Felicia was at a loss of what to say. Here this boy was, this boy that had just met her only hours ago, and had met her because of a medical condition with his father…and he’d been sitting in that chair not only thinking about his dad, but also trying to read her, to figure her out. It gave her a sense of fear, worry, and excitement at the same time, and she wasn’t sure which part was more overwhelming.

She was also confused. Why would he be trying to do that when Stephen might have been dying in a room just around the corner? Maybe she was just another temporary distraction- that would have made the most sense.

Before she could ask anything else his mother walked back over to them, interrupting their brief conversation. She looked less stressed now, and said, “I just got the prescription for the medicine,” and held up a piece of paper before going on, “While I was over there a nurse came over and told the doctor that he’d be in a good enough condition to come home, we just need to keep an eye on him.” At this, she frowned. She didn’t like the fact that this could happen again- not that anyone else did, either.

“That’s…good,” Felicia managed to say. She was keeping a straight face only to make sure that they didn’t know- that they wouldn’t be able to find out. Kyle had already called her “unique”…while the chances of him figuring out just how unique she really was were slim to none, she couldn’t take any chances. Still, she had to stay close. “Is there anything else I can do for you? Because I’d be more than happy to,” she said, with a forced smile appearing on her face.

Kyle looked at her with another stare that bored through her, and she cursed herself for, apparently, being too obvious- at least to him. Maria, on the other hand, didn’t see through her act at all, but still frowned. “You’ve already done so much, dear…”

Randomly, her words reminded Felicia of her older, fragile age. Another pang of sympathy hit her. During the entire time she’d spent sitting with her at the hospital that day, she hadn’t noticed it all that much. Perhaps it was the worry mixed with fear that made Maria seem more innocent and childish. It’s only right to be frightened in a situation like this, but the fear always made whoever was involved look so much younger than they really were. It was the side effect of the worry after that showed their years most prominently.

Before she could be stared at like she was mentally incapable of forming words, she replied, “No, it’s alright. It’s why I offered…I just don’t feel right, helping and then disappearing without making sure everything turns alright.”

“But everything did turn out alright.” This time the sentence did not come from Maria, but instead from her son. He said it as a statement, but she could hear the tiniest questionable tone in his voice. She gulped, almost too loud. Thankfully, it hadn’t been noticeable.

“Yeah, it did,” she said, her voice quiet and unconvincing. She mentally cursed herself for the second time in the past few minutes. Why was she falling apart now? For three years she’d done everything she’d needed to with near perfection. This situation was breaking her, and the reason for that was a complete mystery.

“You can go back to your life then, right?” He didn’t mean to say it meanly. Or at least, she didn’t think so- but it came out that way. It sounded like he was eager for her to get out of their lives and live her own. If that were the case, he would just have to get over it. She needed to be there, whether he liked it or not. It was what was best for everyone, even if no one- including herself- thought so. She had to believe that she could help them, in some way.

Out of nowhere came a question that she wouldn’t have expected to be asked- “Would you like to come to dinner tomorrow night at our house, Felicia?” It came from Maria. She’d ignored her son’s rudeness towards the girl who was a total stranger to them, and offered her a chance to share at meal with them at their home. Felicia found that interesting.

She also saw it as an opening. If she wanted to get involved with them, become a part of their lives- not for very long, never for long- this was her chance. Though it felt a little out of place for her to be agreeing, she couldn’t help herself. After all, it was part of what she was supposed to do. “If I wouldn’t be intruding…”

Felicia glanced at Kyle, who had gone back to avoiding the conversation, his lips pursed. Aside from that tension, his face gave a way nothing. She had to give him credit- he was good at hiding his emotions. He might have been even better than she was at it, even though it had practically been her profession for more than three years. If he’d been able to know what she was, she would have gladly taken lessons from him. Or perhaps she still could if he wasn’t too stubborn- after all, he wouldn’t need to know what they were for.

What she was. That made her sound like she was some sort of creature of the night, like a vampire or a werewolf, or some other sort of demon. Even though she didn’t really know exactly what she was, she was sure she wasn’t working for evil. How could she be when she was sending people to eternal peace and paradise?
Spoken words brought her back to reality.

“Of course you wouldn’t be intruding, child!” Maria chuckled lightheartedly. Her laughter made Felicia smile an unforced smile. Her heart warmed. She really liked Maria- she was a kind and generous person. “I invited you, didn’t I?”

Felicia didn’t say anything- she just kept smiling, and gave one nod of her head. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see the roll of Kyle’s eyes. She sighed. Helping him grieve might be a tougher job than helping his mother.
Maria grabbed a napkin that she’d used earlier to wrap around her coffee cup from the table she’d set it on, took out a pen, and began to write as she said, “Here’s our address- you can come over at around 6. I should be done making dinner by then.” She handed the napkin to me just as quickly as she’d stopped talking.

“Thank you,” Felicia said, not sure what else needed to be added to that sentence. She didn’t feel awkward about it, though. The idea of going to their house to sit down and have dinner with them didn’t feel off at all- in fact, she thought it was comforting…almost natural.

“No,” the other woman said, a genuine smile spreading across her face, the biggest one she’d given all day, “I know I’ve said this too many times to count today, but thank you. You saved my husband’s life.”

Only to allow it to end, Felicia thought bitterly. She really didn’t want to take the love of this woman’s life away from her…but she had no choice. It wasn’t like she was even actually taking him, either. He was being taken- by whom she didn’t know- and she was merely a bystander.

A bystander that could make it all go away with a few simple words.
She wouldn’t. The case was more so that she couldn’t. She wouldn’t have restrained herself with such control if she didn’t have rules to abide by. One of these days she was going to snap, though.

‘To anyone who thinks that they to know the future,’ she broadcast in her head, knowing that it wouldn’t reach anyone. ‘You might want to reconsider your choice of ability- knowing the future is not about winning the lottery. It’s about carrying a burden on your shoulders that you can’t get rid of, no matter how hard you try.’

“Alright,” Maria said, speaking and pulling Felicia out of her endless thoughts, “I suppose we’ll see you tomorrow, then?”

Felicia took a few moments to think about her answer. She did want to go- she needed to, in fact. That didn’t stop her from hesitating. She couldn’t help but think that the real reason why she wanted to accept the offer was that she honestly wanted to get to know them better- definitely more than she was supposed to.
Of course, that didn’t stop her from nodding. There was nothing that could at that point. “Yeah, I’ll see you then…around six, you said?” She wanted to make sure she got the time right, because showing up at the wrong time might make her look like a fool, or even look like she was imposing.

“Yes,” the other woman said, smiling. It was a half-nervous, half-appreciative smile. The kind you would give someone that you didn’t know very well, so that added to the list of what the smile was- appropriate.

Without another exchange of words, they separated. Kyle was the first on to leave the group, heading toward the secretary’s office to find out what room number his father was in, so that he and his mother could go see him, if possible. Maria was next. She gave another tiny nervous smile and followed her son to the open door of the office.

Felicia was left standing there alone, and for several seconds, she didn’t move. It wasn’t that she couldn’t- she just didn’t feel like it. She wanted to stay rooted to the spot and get even more lost in thought than she had already. But she decided that wasn’t the smartest idea- she walked toward the automatic doors of the exit, watching them slide open, and felt the wind rush past her as she walked outside.
There would be time to think when she got home. For right now, she just got to her car, opened the door, and closed it quickly. To stop herself from getting immersed in deep thoughts, she turned the radio on and changed it to a station that would play songs with no meaning whatsoever. As the predictable pop song filled the car’s interior, she drove away.

As she promised herself, her thoughts were saved for when she finally got to her house. She fumbled for the key to unlock the front door, but eventually she got it in and did unlock it. She closed the door and took one of her notorious calming breaths.

She turned around to look in the entrance of her cabin. It wasn’t much- it had two bedrooms, one bigger than the other. Oddly enough she slept in the smaller of the two. It felt comfier to her, familiar. Her room at the house she used to live at was smaller than the rest.

This was her safe haven; a place she could always come back to, no matter what. It was where her thoughts and words were safe. There was no need to worry about anyone finding out her secrets or watching her every move. Here, she could be the real Felicia Moor.

So she began to think. What happened with Stephen Stone that made his case different from the rest? Sure, he had survived the incident. It was just the fact that he had collapsed at all that irked her. Nothing like that had ever happened before. Was it supposed to happen, or did something go wrong? She couldn’t decide.

Since he didn’t die today, whatever had gone wrong couldn’t have been too bad- nothing was off schedule, and destiny was left undisturbed. She could have stopped thinking about it entirely right then, but she wouldn’t let herself. Even though it was probably predetermined, something about the collapse felt wrong to her, and she couldn’t put her finger on it.

She ran her fingers through her hair. Another calming breath took place. She’d probably had more of those in the past 24 hours than she’d had in the past three years. While that was quite an exaggeration, it sure felt like it was the truth.

“There’s nothing to worry about,” she said out loud, rather than inside her head, to make herself believe that. After all, she was probably being paranoid about something that would turn out to be nothing. Insert next calming breath here.

The phone rang, making her jump. Who would be calling? She didn’t make any connections with ‘normal’ people, and the other counselors didn’t call her. She furrowed her eyebrows, and picked up the phone, looking at the Caller ID before she hit the talk button, which only added to her confusion. The number was blocked. Instead of letting the voicemail pick up, however, she answered it.

Stranger still, before she even got a chance to say hello and ask who it was, the person on the other line said, “Something’s wrong.”

Molly.