Spuffy, Bangel or Ruffy?

[Deleted]

I was thinkin: Spangel. Enough said.

[Glenn]

And i'm thinking, show some respect to the admin. So say more, hopefully ending in an apology.

My mind changes constantly as to which of these is my favourite. I enjoy all of them at points and then not at others. Im feeling a bit Bangel-y at the moment. Though i did just watch, I Will Remember You.

[Deleted]

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't know people were gonna go all Ghandi on me.

[Kana]

Erm, anyway....

I was actually thinking that although Riley wasn't my favourite character he's actually my favourite ex. He actually showed Buffy a lot of respect in As You Were and didn't judge her as much as he could have done. He seemed so self assured and honest with Buffy. He admitted seeing her with Spike didn't thrill him but he dealt with it and also admitted he was scared of seeing her.

It irks many fans and myself how quickly Riley seemed to get over Buffy but I suppose from inside the show the important issue is that he did. Angel and Spike fell over themselves trying to follow her around. Angel should have moved on in the event of Cordy and Nina and Spike should made a choice: find faith in yourself and find Buffy or accept it isn't happening and move on and Spike seemed to do neither. I never thought Riley would be the most mature out of the three of them.

[Shaun]

jake said:

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't know people were gonna go all Ghandi on me.

The rules are there for everyone, one word answers aren't enough said. This is a discussion forum, and posts like yours aren't contributing to making this a discussion Lose the sarcasm and follow the rules, they aren't there for no reason.

[Allan]

kana said:

It irks many fans and myself how quickly Riley seemed to get over Buffy but I suppose from inside the show the important issue is that he did. Angel and Spike fell over themselves trying to follow her around. Angel should have moved on in the event of Cordy and Nina and Spike should made a choice: find faith in yourself and find Buffy or accept it isn't happening and move on and Spike seemed to do neither. I never thought Riley would be the most mature out of the three of them.

I don't get why it irks people so much, myself. They broke up and moved on, people do that. Granted, Riley was married, which is a bit further than simply dating someone by that point, but he alwasy struck me as the type of character who would want to settle down once he met the right woman.

[Kana]

I think it's the whole, it took him ages to get over but yet he got married quickly but like you said it's easily legitmized but it shows how much Riley really matured though. If he's not the best boyfriend, I think he's the best ex lol.

[Shaun]

I'd have a hard time believing my ex took a long time to get over me if she turned up married one year later I don't think it shows he matured, but that he rushed out of one relationship and into the next. He thought Buffy was the right woman and loved her, but 12 months is not a long time to get over that and find someone else you are ready to marry, unless its a rash decision. Sure people can fall in love that fast, but getting married that soon especially when with their line of work they wouldn't have had a lot of time to spend together outside of working, was a bad move. I don't disbelieve that Riley loves Sam, but I don't call rushing into marriage with someone after spending what Sam calls a long time getting over Buffy, a mature move.

[Beck]

ITA with Shaun. Rushing into marriage is in NO WAY being the more mature ex. Marriage is a huge step. Its a commitment about forever, and getting married that fast can only be looked at as a quick and silly decision that in the long run will slap them both in the face. Lets look at the timeline.

Riley loves Buffy. Riley leaves heartbroken. Riley takes - in Sam's words - aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaages to get over Buffy. What is ages? One month? Riley and Sam meet. Riley and Sam get married. All in ONE YEAR. Even if it took him 3 months to get over Buffy, does Sam not realise hello, rebound? Plus yeah, they are working a LOT. When was the time for getting to know each other outside of work? The quality time? So while he may have moved on which was good and unlike the other two, he threw himself into a marriage which was infinitely less mature and less smart and going to cause hurt. And then the way Buffy found out - harsh. Not directly Riley's fault, but he should have discussed with Sam how to tell her.

[Glenn]

They are both in life and death situations, probably every day so figured that they needn't wait for too long. Plus the army is a very close environment, people bond very fast. If Sam and Riley went out on missions together they could have been in very close quarters for weeks even months at a time. If i was doing Riley's job, knowing that any day could be my last, i think i would marry just as fast

[Kana]

I think we tend to judge people by our own standards. Maybe Sam was the rebound girl at first but I don't think it ended up that way but I guess we'll never know, but certainly I don't believe what Angel and Spike did was more mature, following around their ex like a couple of teenagers. There's no time limit on a broken heart but maybe it didn't cut Riley as deep as all that. I think it was counted 6/7 months to get over it. I'm not sure. We can't judge everyone by our standards and people move on in different ways. Is it a little dogmatic to say Riley way was wrong?

[Shaun]

I don't think Angel or Spike handled the split more maturely, but I would not say Riley's handling was mature. There is nothing wrong with Riley moving on, but if it took 6 or 7 months to move on from Buffy, there were only a few months there with him and Sam falling in love and getting married. Its too rushed, even knowing they could die any day. Riley has had that for years, and presumably do has Sam. I don't believe it is a good move for anyone to get married after such a short time, especially so soon after getting out of such an important relationship.

[Beck]

So they could die soon Glenn, why does that mean they need to marry? Why not date and make sure to spend time together? Plus from what Sam said to Anya and Xander about their wedding, they obviously had more than a simple service, that takes planning. MONTHS and MONTHS of planning. Also, when did they get married? That wasn't mentioned, though it obviously wasn't only a month ago. Rushed, rushed, rushed. THAT is what people have a problem with, including me.

Kana, EVERYONE judges others on their own standards, thats the way of life. Course what is right or wrong for one person isn't for everyone.

[jeanvic]

I think both Spike and Angel were mature abut her. We can't take TGIQ as any evidence cos that was a cock up ep. Angel left her in Season 3 and was the mature voice of the two. After that, he left her alone unles she needed help. Same with Spike. H advocated to stay away from her and let her get on with life. I would say Riley was immature. Giving an ultimatum?? "Only the sith deal in absolutes." And then remarrying when he still loved her, as if it was a case of "look what you missed out on!"

That's my take anyway.

[Nico]

If Riley's immaturity is being judged by events taking place AFTER he split with buffy why should Angel and Spike be any different?, Like was mentioned they stalked her, if anything all three could've handled the situation more maturely.

I also agree, you dont split with someone then go get married so soon after, its ridiculous, silly to marry after knowing someone such a short time, and even sillier to marry someone after you have just broken up with someone you "Love".

[Allan]

It makes me wonder whether Riley understood what "love" was when he was with Buffy. You always hear about people who think they're in love until they really are, so maybe that's the case there?

[Kana]

admin said:

So they could die soon Glenn, why does that mean they need to marry? Why not date and make sure to spend time together? Plus from what Sam said to Anya and Xander about their wedding, they obviously had more than a simple service, that takes planning. MONTHS and MONTHS of planning. Also, when did they get married? That wasn't mentioned, though it obviously wasn't only a month ago. Rushed, rushed, rushed. THAT is what people have a problem with, including me.

Kana, EVERYONE judges others on their own standards, thats the way of life. Course what is right or wrong for one person isn't for everyone.

Not everyone. Love is subjective. I don't presume to know what's right for another person when it comes to that. What I try nd do is understand wht it meant for that particular person rather than simply call it wrong. If it works for Riley then it works for him.

The reason I'm more harsh with Spike and Angel is because they admited they should have moved on and the main point is that being quite non judgemental Buffy's lifestyle and moving on with his wife was most likely the best thing for both of them while locking Buffy in a bo like Spike was suggesting isn't lol.

I mean I've seen different type of relationships work out, even the rebound ones so I've learnt not to judge so readily.

[Beck]

Of course love is subjective. But we all draw on our own experiences, our own morals and ethics, our own set of values when we form an opinion. Perhaps judging is not the right word. Riley being non judgemental about Buffy's choices was good, I was pleased with that. But I still maintain that rushing into marriage with someone so soon after being so devastated over the split with Buffy, was NOT a "mature" way of handling things. Marriage is forever - its not a decision to be made that fast. We're all missing the months it would have taken to plan this wedding, and how long they must have been married? Hmm. Sounds like they were together maybe a month before deciding to wed. Yes it could work out, but so what was the rush?

[Vyse]

I actually agree with Beck I may be wrong, but I seem to remember Riley said in "As You Were" that he has been married for 4 months... The "ages" it took him to get over Buffy were not "ages" enough for me not to be saddened

[dru]

I was so not a spuffy fan the first time i ever watched the seasons on t.v. I thought it was ridiculous, honestly. Seemed so not believable to me. But watching it again as ive approached season 7 now after going fully through the box set, i guess i understand it more and feel better about it. But i still think Bangel is the better choice. I'm not sitting here saying im a crazed bangel fan and omg if you disagree well your wrong! lol truth is i dont feel strongly enough about any of her relationships to sit for too long and argue them. There were other elements to the show that were more important to me than her romances.

Though i always kinda wished xander would get her, sometimes lol. Poor Xand. He always loved her.